He isn't really an old flame, we were never really intimate, hell I haven't even seen him naked.. lol we met at a bar, met via a friend and hung out a few times... he stayed over the last night before he was to leave and that was that. Weird thing is that yes I was worried about him etc, but if I really wanted him to stay I would have ran out and stopped him from getting on to that bus but I didn't.

He is well aware of my relationship with my bf, he respects it. Friendship if that is all i'd be looking for, even if it was that. I am not looking to resurrect old feelings at all, i know what I have is fantastic, this is a man that I hope to marry one day... I don't think it will bring back the pain, it might be awkward, I don't know. It may not be a good idea, I don't know. I don't have any feelings for him anymore in that sense, but it would be nice to have that closure properly instead of how it was long distance and through email. If he needs it then perfect... we move on. If we decide to keep in touch that will be fine too... I don't know if I feel obligated, in a way it would be nice to touch base again, that may sound crazy. I want my BF to be there but it's impossible.

I don't know.