thanks for caring and writing back. the real "stickler" here is that the person i was referring to is my dad...i can't really just not be around him. i do limit the time spent. i will see him tonight. my boys wanted grandpa and grandma to come to pizza hut and bowling since it's my oldest's birthday.

you poem is immersing. it's like someone else lives and breathes the same experience/torment as you do. i suppose even though i can feel so alone in it, poems like yours help me realize that it's really not aloneness...you wade through the same %#@&#! as i. thank you for sharing.