<font color="red"> </font> First let me say hi to everyone who reads this and takes the time to actually read about me and what I might have to say, it means alot to me and its something Im not use to doing...Talking about myself and all the millions of thoughts and feelings that go on inside of me on a daily basis, and trust me sometimes...its alot.



So let me start by first telling you all, My name is Erin and Im a 29 year old, mother of 2 wonderful boys who are almost 10 years old and 14 months old they are my life.

I have a wonderful man in my life who thru good times and bad we have managed to make it and will continue to do so, I honestly believe he is my soul mate and we were destined to be together.

Ok so recently I was diagnosed with GAD, *generalized anxiety disorder* and its been a tough few weeks. Learning to let go of things and thoughts and feelings that you have trapped inside of you for years and years is hard to do, and not alot of people understand you or why you think the way you do. If I have a dollar for every time someone told me *Just dont think that way* Id be a rich momma!

So I am a survivor of sexual abuse, Im OCD and GAD and ALL the symptoms of the GAD is there, even eating is now becoming a problem for me. Im over weight which is caused from years of not having self esteem and to hide my body from anyone wanting to hurt me...but now and I have for years, associated food with fat. Im working on it and Yes I know all the right ways to lose weight and all the things Im suppose to do and not do.... People dont understand when I say I know the right way! Just my brain and thoughts say different.

My brain NEVER shuts off... and sometimes the thoughts that go thru it are down right stupid and like I said I know the whole time the right way or whatever but I never could get rid of the thoughts, now Im working on it and finally on medication when I had a burn out at work and thought I was going to die if I stayed there any longer.. Now that I know whats going on...or that I have been *Labeled* its starting to make more sense to me...slowly, but at least its easier to take sometimes when I can justify why Im thinking what Im thinking.....*then my brain says......ohhh but now everyone thinks you are using it as a crutch* ... Oh did i forget to mention that I am a People Pleaser to no extent.... But I can get into more then that if anyone cares to hear about it, Like I said this is the first time Ive openly talked about myself... Usually Im the funny Erin, everyone comes to me and I fix them... its been that way since I was a little girl...

Take Care and Have a Great Day!

*my brain is now saying....why did you babble, no one wants to hear your sob story!* <font color="red"> </font>