(((((((Deli)))) Especially because pdoc said he didnt want you to get hurt and he wants to supervise, I think he cares a great deal about you and wants to give you (maybe) the point of view of the perp, maybe to lessen feelings that anything was your fault.

If you can understand what is going on in the mind of the perp, maybe you can understand that you were controlled and manipulated. When someone is so much older, they can easily "control" the thoughts of a younger person.

I struggle with this, too. Especially exploitation when I was older and should have known better. I blame myself and it is VERY difficult to see the manipulation of a perp. Especially when it is someone (as a child) that I loved and was supposed to love me. If I see him as a perp, then where does that leave me? Alone.