(((((((((Zooropa))))))))))))
Thank you for sharing
And good for you! That would take an awful lot of courage to do, so I'm glad your T was able to help you out and I hope that this makes you feel a lot lighter and better too.
Edit: Okay, so I just saw your last reply...
Quote:
Originally Posted by zooropa
thank you kt and dream
I am in such a bad place right now, I can't believe ONE time of just STARTING to talk about my trauma has triggered this seemingly unending flood of flashbacks & memories & basically ********.
I feel utterly hopeless because before I really believed that I had spent a year learning the DBT skills & building my relationship with T & then we could start the trauma work. And I *knew* it would be hard, don't get me wrong. But this? This is a state incompatible with life. So it's either live the way I was before, and carry my pain all alone & never get better, or go through this which I CANNOT DO.
I guess that's the thing. I knew the trauma work would be hard but I am strong & have spent the last 6 months just getting stronger & stronger. I knew it'd be difficult & painful but I thought I could DO it. Now I know I cannot. And I can't live like this, with the memories & the pain (emotional & physical) & the flashbacks just right there on the surface all the time. Can't sleep, it's not worth even trying. Can't escape when the boogeyman is IN MY HEAD.
Nobody understands, nobody IRL, but I guess I'm writing this here because I think that if there's anybody anywhere that will understand it will be somebody here.  |
You ARE strong. I doubt very much than any of us can predict what will happen to us emotionally after we try to begin talking about our abuse... but you did it, you did fantastically.
If you can, take some time off work or school or whatever other activities you do (unless they're fun) and just try to relax and process all the stuff that happened in session. Remember the positive comments your T made to you, and try to remember to ground yourself. Did you learn any grounding activities in therapy to help?
YOU WILL GET THROUGH THIS. I PROMISE YOU THAT MUCH, BECAUSE WE WILL BE WITH YOU NO MATTER WHAT. Okay?
I may not understand all of what you've been through, but if you need someone to talk to (even about the triggering stuff) - please PM me, okay? I want to be able to help if I can - don't go through this alone, you've got friends here and people who care about you and your wellbeing.