Dear Redblue ~ Your mom is projecting blame onto you that may rightfully belong to her. People with paranoia tend to do that. I am sorry that this is happening to you, very, very sorry. Concentrate on preparing yourself for independence, whatever that may take in your case [e.g. concentrate on studying for college; or get a part time job to prepare yourself for the working world]. Realize that you are NOT to blame, which you seem to have been well able to do, so that the harm done to you is minimized. Then busy yourself with things not involving her, stay away from her as much as possible, and prepare to move out when you can. Also - try to see her as having severe problems of her own, so that, as time goes by, you can forgive her, not for her sake, but rather to keep the anger from poisoning you! Know that you are cared about here ~ billieJ