Hello Melba,

I had a similar feeling on the opposite end of the spectrum this past week. I have been having a very hard time while driving and alone and have to fight the urge to close my eyes. I was trying to describe to T what it felt like -- the desire to shut out the thinking that happens when alone; T said that I was missing the internalized mother. But when I left him the other day, I was okay in my car. I had filled myself with T. He was "with" me. And I didn't have the urge to self-destruct; at least for a while. I realized I had replaced the empty feeling with T. Yes, it is truly a gift that we can have these cognitive thoughts of missing and filling ourselves with T.

And always always hope.

Best.