i do self harm, sometime regularly, but sometimes not for about a week. but my question is about this; sometimes when trying to fall asleep, i have vivid visions/thoughts of me clamping a red-hot straightning iron down on my arm, or getting a butchers knife and slamming it down on my arm below the elbow.

a few days ago i tried burning my arm with a pair of straightners, but couldn't bring myself to do it. so what are my thought about? they're so scary when i have them that i have to get up and watch tv to distract myself. xxxxxxxxxxx