Quote:
Originally Posted by Jill326
I have been to 4 different therapists and they were all very different.
The first one did not speak. She just sat there and I would spill out my feelings and then I would look back at her. She didn't say anything. This made me talk more just to fill the silence. I didn't care for this. Supposedly this is a form of psychotherapy, but I found it annoying.
The second one was awful. She scolded me. One day I came in feeling more hopeless than usual. I basically said, "I don't care anymore". She replied saying that she saw a bad future for me. Something like, "I see you depending on others in the future. You'll be in a bad position, depending on other men and they'll take advantage of you." Not exactly encouraging.
The third one was very nice. I talked and she responded in a noncritical way. She would also talk to my mother and give her advice for how to deal with me in a nonjudgmental way. Unfortunately she got too expensive.
The next one is like the third one except a lot cheaper. She gives me realistic advice that I can actually apply to my life.
So what are your experiences with therapy? I am interested because I am interested in this and am considering a career.
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I am so glad to hear that you quit the therapists who weren't working out for you and that you found one who did.
I have quit quite a few -- but in a couple of cases, I quit long after I should, and am still dealing with the aftereffects many years later. Those two were in some ways like your second therapist, saying dire things.
For example one said, "I can't help you if you take everything I say as criticism." Regrettably, I reacted by feeling guilty and ashamed of "taking everything she said as criticism". It wasn't until four years later that I remembered/realized that I hadn't taken everything she said as criticism -- but that I found much of what she said just plain shocking and/or inappropriate. One example: When I said I was somewhat shy, she said, "You gave up your power."
The second said (when I finally said I was going to quit seeing her), "You'll never get better if you keep seeking the perfect therapist". By that time I had started reading about cognitive therapy and recognized these comments as examples of what the cognitive therapists consider distorted thoughts. Your second therapist's comments also fit into their category of distorted thoughts.
If you care to know more about my experiences, please see my posts in the threads "Older Clients" and "Problems and Progress in Therapy"
My advice for a future therapist: Please remember that everyone is different; one size does not fit all.
Also, in previous posts in the threads mentioned above, I've mentioned books on therapy that I recommend; they can help you see the variety in clients and their needs.
Thanks very much for starting this thread.