Just an update - I had my session today. I read my little ones' letter to T and my adult letter to T - it was so unbelievably difficult and painful, but I stopped myself from letting all the pain out. T and I talked about so much, our rupture, how we can get back to a better place. I want to get there now, but T said I can't push those feelings aside like I've always done, we need to work through them. T reassured me that we're gonna be fine, and that it's good that I made her look within herself at why she said some of the things she said. T asked me about my hurt and tried to understand it better. T wanted me to reread the letters, but we were almost out of time - T said she wanted to give me another chance to really let my emotions out, I told T it would help if she encouraged me to do it. And T said there was so much in the letters to discuss, she'd like us to read them line by line. I think it could be good, though, so that's what we're gonna do on Monday at my next session.

T and I also talked about how seeing her twice a week helps me process sessions better, and T has an opening now, so instead of twice every other week, I'm going to try seeing T twice a week for awhile!

Thanks for the support, all!