Yes Sheila it's like Kati said, you may not intend to cut deeply but ut oh.... *everything* you said I relate to. I started in my teens & I am a lot older Cutting is still a struggle. Looking back if I would have stopped cold turkey, IDK I've been hospitalized for months, you see this may turn into an addiction. You don't want that. You have a life to enjoy!!! When a family member sees a scar (which I keep covered all summer) & that *will* happen to you too, the pain I see in them that I caused, rips my heart apart.
You do not mention a Therapist. I strongly suggest you find one Sheila. They will help you w/ your anger & you can talk about how to *safely* release the anger. The cutting takes is away for the moment. It *always* comes back bc you haven't worked your issues through/out. There also is new, excellent medication that will aid you as you work in therapy. Plz listen Sheila. PM me any time ok.

*Always* here 4 U,
Holmes

P.S. My List for not cutting is over 1,000, just doesn't do it. You have to work this out. YOU are what's Worth IT!