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turquoisesea · Dec 08, 2009, 11:02 AM

(((((((justfloating)))))))

I don't know what this is worth, but I do believe things can get better. You mentioned a few things that have improved. That's good.

I think having depression can be like being in an underground labyrinth. You're looking for the way out, you're looking for the ray of sunlight that will guide you. But the labyrinth is tricky. Sometimes you'll head toward that light and find only a dead end. But as you explore this maze you get a better sense of it. And I do believe that you're making your way out closer to the sun. Its just that when we're this deep in the maze it's hard to imagine being outside of it, being able to find the way out.

You're young. You have some college education. You have parents who still are financially taking care of you. You have a therapy support system. Once you get out of school you have more options than you think. Some you may not like, others you will. Once you have that degree, in the eyes of the world you are "better" and "more valuable". That means that YOU will have more control over your job. Maybe this can be an additional improvement that will mean alot to you.

I'm not sure which country you'll end up in. But in the US, I'm sure say a bank would be more likely to hire someone with a college degree. Sure banking might not be what you want but it could get you money for another smaller degree if you want more credentials. You could also probably do something in teaching for your degree and/or something in writing. You could even go out and decide you want to wait tables for a year O.o (not the best job but what I'm saying is you have a lot of options).

I guess what I'm saying (in my long-winded turquoisesea kind of way) is that your life has a ton of potential despite this depression and how you feel right now. You have the ability to start shaping your future. And I believe you CAN get better.

*sends you some coffee*