good luck with all of these things you are struggling with. I don't know if I'm the best to give advice in these situations either, as I'm not in a relationship right now, and also tend to isolate myself a lot since a lot of people I know drink, and I don't drink anymore...but, doing something with a friend sounds wonderful. It's good to have your own life too that is separate from your boyfriend. Also, doing things that you love to do, taking care of yourself and not being so dependent on him might be healthier, but I don't know how you'd go about doing that, it's just my analysis from what you wrote. Having a conversation with him about your concerns, like other people wrote, would probably be a good idea. Good luck on this journey you are on.