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Dec 08, 2009, 07:42 PM
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Member Since: Jun 2009
Location: Nova Scotia
Posts: 5,146
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I wasn't going to bother writing this but I'm sitting here bored to death and thought some may like something new to read.
I can't stop having negative thoughts . I feel so alone and I know you guys are always here when I need support. I went for a walk tonight without my dog , it was cold , and I just felt completely lost.
I went into a few stores and my thoughts had me so obsessed with myself that I had to just get out of there. I recently went to a community outreach program for the mentally ill where they find housing and employment and serve meals for a dollar and all sorts of other things. I filled out an application to join that has to be approved by my Psychiatrist first for approval. There is no pressure where you have to be there at a certain time or even everyday. It's a come and go as you please program. I would have to take a bus ride which would take about an hour to get there. The problem is I get these negative thoughts that tell me I'm just headed for another disappointment.
I don't think I can stick with it. In fact I'm pretty sure I won't.
This is my biggest problem. Following through. I'm so used to giving up. Thanks for reading ....... I'm trying ... but it's not good enough.
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 Depression is not a weakness ...... it is a sign that you have been strong for too long.
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