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Elysium · Dec 10, 2009, 09:03 PM

I am feeling quite conergitated!!

Yes...this is my word. I made it up!! It is the state of being confused, nervous, and agitated all at the same time.

Anyway...I am sick as a dog right now...physically. The other morning, after I got home from work, I was eating a light snack of milk and toffee-buttered popped corn. I was really tired....and I guess you're not supposed to sleep with food in your mouth because when I nodded off briefly while sitting on my couch I inhaled!!!

OUCH!!!!

I breathed in a mouthful of milk and popped corn bits and my chest felt like it exploded!!! Anyone who has ever chocked on their own spit or on a sip of water knows that it can be painful and you cough for a while. Those who have had the experience of a deeper aspiration know that it not only makes you cough forever, but it makes your lungs hurt and burn sooooo bad!!

Anyway...my own stupid fault for eating and sleeping at the same time. Who knew it would have such affects, right?

What has me all conergitated is that due to this even I developed a bad case of laryngitis with mild case of epiglottitis. Now the laryngitis I can hang with. But epiglottitis can be quite dangerous. Even deadly. This is when the little flap that covers your windpipe when you swallow swells up and starts to obstruct your airway.

So...I went to bed after this incident, slept for a while and went to work. I felt horrible. My chest was tight, I was SOB, I couldn't swallow, throat hurt, yada, yada, yada!!

Managed to work through it and had a day off yesterday. Well it got worse. It seems that due to aspirating on the milk and the popped corn, I am developing a rather irritating chest infection. I don't have an official fever at this point, but I tend to run low, in the 96 degree range, and lately the temps been up in the 98 degree range...so it's a temp for me.

I ache all over, even more SOB with a productive cough. Just yucky...and I feel like crap. I gurgle when I breathe.

I called into work this morning around 6am and told them how bad I felt and that I didn't think I should come in tonight. I work for an agency and they said okay, feel better. I went back to bed. Four hours later my Manager from my agency calls me and wants to know what's up. He says that the Hospital I work for told him that they wanted to cancel my contract due to the couple sick calls I had made.

Excuse me? This from a hospital!! This from the same company who told us during Orientation that if we are sick, don't come in, stay home? I'm a freaking Nurse on the Respiratory floor for Mergatroy's sake!! I could be working my way up to aspiration Pneumonia and they're threatening to tank my contract because I am ill!!

I called in earlier about 2pm and told my agency manager that I would come into work tonight. I said...if they want me there, I will go. I am sick, I feel like crap, I shouldn't be around patients, but I will put on my big girl panties and go. I cried all day because I really don't feel well, but I can't lose my contract. I will be wearing a face mask while working with my patients but I'll be damned if I am going to blow this opportunity with them. Even though I am legitimately ill.

My manager called me back 5 minutes later and said "They don't need you to come in until Seven tonight so don't go in now. They only need you for a four hour shift tonight."

THIS is what really pissed me off the most!!!!! They make a big deal of me calling in ill, threaten to cancel my contract, and when I finally give in and say I will come in they say "Oh, well...we don't REALLY need you to come in...so just come in at 7."

GRRRRRRRRRRR!!!

You would think that Hospitals and the healthcare industry would be more compassionate with Nurses who are ill and encourage them to be healthy and not bring in any type of bugs that may infect the rest of their staff and their patients. They talk the good talk when they tell you to stay home in orientation, but really that's all it is is talk. It's really about the bottom line.

I know that it is difficult to work short when a nurse does not come in. But geez, c'mon. I even tried to help find a nurse to cover my shift this morning....and they didn't even say thanks for that.

Gotta go to work........