Well, it seems I'm finally being forgotten. My best friend and I have been NC 3 weeks on Monday (until today). I learned that she's going to throw out everything I made for her over the 8 years we've been friends. I simply wanted to contact her to ask if she's getting rid of it anyways, If I could have it....As over 8 years I've made a lot of things for her (scrapbooks, cards, hand written notes etc). A lot of what I made is out of pictures, as I'm a photographer. I really feel as if this is the ultimate betrayal cause I would never THINK about discarding anything/everything.

I see it as we had a falling out and aren't friends any longer. I can accept that. I had an inkling that when she didn't call me and tell me Happy Thanksgiving that we were done. Or at least a "thank you" email for the picture collage I gave her for Thanksgiving when I returned all of her belongings to her as she asked. Then I thought to myself "maybe Christmas". Maybe after those two months of NC she'll at least call me and tell me Merry Christmas. I wouldn't ask her to come back...as I want her to be happy even if that means not being friends. But I feel I at least deserved a Happy Holidays or something. Seeing as she's tossing everything I've ever given her, I guess its a safe bet to say I won't get that call on Christmas. I guess the 8 years I tried to be the best wasn't enough.

I know I wasn't always pleasant to be around and we've had our good deal of arguements.. But it really hurts that someone would actually consider throwing away all the memories of 8 years. Packing it up and putting it away is one thing, but throwing it in the trash is completely different. (Agreed?)

I'm not really sure how I feel right now except betrayed and defeated. I'm not sure what I should do or how I should handle the situation. When I called, she quickly hung up. I don't want to call her again cause I don't want to make her upset (although I probably already did by calling in the first place). I don't really have anyone to talk to, cause I never bring her up into conversations cause I find it disrespectful and then I'll just be even more depressed.

I'm struggling right now to not SI again because I know in the end it won't be worth it. I wasn't planning on removing anything off my walls, but I guess since it came down to this I should probably take the pictures of her down in my house and pack em up in boxes. Sad part is I think I'll have to literally take down every single picture frame because she's in 99% of the pictures. Good thing I have the next 3 weeks off of school cause it's gonna be a long process packing it all along with the sadness and despair having to look at them in the process.

Just a quote to end with that seems suitable right now......

"The worst part of saying goodbye, is having to do it again everyday;
everyday we face the truth, they're gone."

Any thoughts? Suggestions? Words of encouragement? I appreciate anyone reading this.