In my almost 50 years I have noticed that friendships seem to take on a life of their own. It simply may be too painful for her to keep reminders of you in her house and be saying she is throwing them out....well, passive aggressive female thing to do. I suspect that she will regret getting rid of those items one day. I don't know why your friendship ended, but hang in there. I seen relationships where it seemed never again and after time......the frienship resumes. I tell my daughter that if it is meant to be, it will happen. In the meantime ,move on. sorry this is happening to you, but try not to si. You are worth better than that and will only extend the pain of the loss. You sound very pulled together over all this, be sure to give yourself credit. blessings!