I found that while I wasn't really open to admitting this at first, I was exceptionally risque in my behavior before I had my son. Something about getting pregnant (unexpectedly and with a man I didn't even really like) changed the way my episodes go. Since then, things are way more mixed with me. I'll be frantically working on whatever random project, but feeling an inner turmoil that is almost unbearable. I do the author thing to, or I'll do it with a particular subject area. And I've found that while I am a generous person, things that I become fixated on are very hard for me to share.