Quote:
Originally Posted by treehouse
I'm sorry
I'm in such a crappy place. I don't know what to do. I'm grasping, and I don't know if I am making mistakes.
I have physical symptoms AGAIN, after spending September and October so sick. That scares me. Whenever we get deep deep in the CSA stuff, the physical stuff starts.
I've e-mailed with T AND talked to him on the phone today. I feel like that's it, I don't get any more T until my next appt (tues). He didn't say that, but I understand that there are limits.
I TOLD MY H ABOUT THE CSA. And a friend. Both. Todsay. I HAVDE NEVER TODL ANYEON IN REALLIFE ABOU TIT EVER.
im scared
I didnt know what else to do
i feel dirty and exposedand scared
And i e-mailed old teacher t to see if shecould help. anyone who was here last winter knows that is crazy, but i don'tknow. i know she is so good with energy work
i'm scared, and crying, and lonely and trying so hard not to wall off and to reach out, but i don't know ifi'mdoing the right thing reaching out or making big mistakes
someone please tell me what to do
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(((((Tree)))))
There is no need to apologize!!!!!
You did something so big and scary. You trusted your H and friend to be able to hear about what happened to you. That is such a big thing. I know you had thought about telling your H in the past. That is so big that you did it. Can you ask him for support also along with T? I know that I can feel vulnerable and naked when I share something new and with T I feel the same way. I can definitely see how you would feel that way after sharing with your H and friend. That is totally normal. I know when I told my parents about being SAed (I know it isn't quite the same) I was so scared and felt so vulnerable. All I wanted to do was hide. Your feelings are normal.
Please let us know how you are doing. We are here to support you.
