you know, i've been thinking a lot about this this morning... and now that i am back in the safe zone (or rather the safe alter) I hear the others chastizing one internal who keeps wishing for more from this post. "Why are you doing this, you just want attention". Which totally wasn't true last night - las night i was prety shaken about relocating the dangerous object (the host and I know where it is, but we don't need the harmful alters knowing or getting reminded). Yet today, the host is condemming the hurtful one for wanting attention today.
The hurtful one finally said "YEAH i DO want some attention, is that ok with you??!?!"
And it got me thinking. We never speak to that one unless s/he is harming. I (kiya) have tried in the past to no avail. But we all forget that things change, alters grow and adapt and maybe the harmful one DOES need some attention - some care, someone to talk to, some therapy. I'd not thought about it before.
And yet, rarely is anywhere safe for anyone to talk about hurtful ideas (esp when that one is the one that harms the body).
Is any of this making sense?
I don't feel the alter (or I) can even have this convo with T without her deciding I need to be hospitalized. Even tho i have this new awareness about it. Esp since this happened while she was out of town for a week, and will be out of the country for 3 weeks next month (and we went through this exact senario last Jan too *sigh*).
It makes us sad that there is no place for that convo to happen. How can healing be done when parts cannot be addressed for fear? =( I know T worries that the convo may (and i suppose often) lead(s) to destructive behaviors and that i'll get totally destablized and not able to stop the hurtful one.
What a catch 22. meh.