There were a few reasons but the main reason that I can't see her because she only sees clients that are children and younger adults. I had a birthday that cut me from her client list. Also though she isn't seeing clients as a therapist next year anyway so even if i wasn't the age I am, I couldn't see her anyway. There is nothing I or T could do. I terminated therapy suddenly without telling T. Then wrote her after a few weeks had passed. T wrote back to me that is the letter I am talking about.
Our relationship was more than just a therapeutic relationship. I think its important that everyone acknowlages that this is the case.
I had been seeing her for a very long time. 4 years. When i first saw her i was distant, paranoid and anxious, and didn't talk much. T helped me to talk and many other things, she helped me feel real and be a person again.

I don't understand why people on here are advising me to move on when T had never shown that much of her counter transference and now she is speaking very openly about it in a letter. It of course would evoke feelings from any client.