Hi everyone thanks for reasing, im 24yo male ive dealt with depression for about 10years, and the last year or so have been struggling with anxiety/ocd. My intrusive thoughts are so persistent and really terrifying. They mostly involve harming my son or father physically/sexually, and sometime even dreams, or i should say nightmares about the same thing. I read up on everything about this and i am fully aware i would never, ever harm anyone let alone my loved family members. I seem to have the Obsession without the complusion in OCD. I also have other less violents strange intrsuvie thoughts, like spitting on randoms strangers, kissing my male friends [ not homosexual at all ] these obsession all seem to be the totall opposite of who i am really am, like it knows exactly how to disturb and distress me. I am taking citalropram, and xanax as need which helps sometimes, but for whatever reason i have these intrusive thoughts/anxiety more so during this time of year. Some times the anxiety turns into panic attacks and yesterday was my first one in like 7months but it was terrible..does anyone have similar issues like this? any advise on different meds or anything else helps? therapy? meditation or something i dunno i just need help with this as much as possible, thanks