Wow. This was powerful. I was realizing this week - after attempting to call three family members back to back and getting "I can't talk right now, I'll call you back" that I was left with no one to reach out to at a really, really low point.

I work many hours - often don't have time to take lunch or a break - and have been feeling lately like my life is carrying me along from obligation to obligation without a chance to catch my breath. I often end up at the end of the day, dazed and realizing I have perhaps 1/2 an hour to decompress before it's time to go to bed and start it all over again the next day.

It took three "hang ups" in fifteen minutes to make me suddenly realize - I'm the one others rely on to be strong, to be constant. My relationships are really one-sided and not only do I share the blame for letting them get that way, but it has left me literally alone in a crowded room. The people I have surrounded myself with have no idea what's really going on inside of me, and most of them aren't likely to be able (or willing) to find out.

It has made me begin rethinking many things, but mostly that I don't want my life to be this way anymore. I want a connection to folks, I want equal, supportive relationships instead.