I had planned on writing out another elaborate post about my depression, how I haven't bought a single christmas present yet. How instead of healing my wounds are festering. About how stale and pointless my life has become, but I don't see the point. I can write posts until my fingers break but unless I actually do something, nothing will change. I just... I don't know how to make that change, and feeling like I'm not in control only adds to feelings of despair. Weeks fade into my memory with not a single event to hold onto. Hearts broken beyond repair, brain can't produce a happy thought. I just want to be free of all of this.