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Originally Posted by treehouse
I remember when I first got into trauma stuff that it seemed IMPOSSIBLE to slow it down.  |
That is how I feel. I have memories that keep pushing at me. Everything triggers a memory and it is making me tense.
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I guess the main thing that helps ME is a promise that I will get to it later. I think I have these younger parts that are screaming to be heard, and that need reassurance that they WILL be heard, just not now.
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When I read this I remembered that this is similar to what ftt told me. To talk to my little parts as I would a child I love. They they will be heard later.
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Can you tell the parts of you that are pushing at you that you hear them, and that what they have to say is important, and that they will have all the time they need to express themselves...but that right now you need to be grown up and you need time to work on feeling a little better?
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I can try, it might be hard to do that in the moment when my 8 yo wants to throw things, but I forgot that ftt told me to talk to my little parts that push at me this way. This is something that could really work and help to gain some adult control.
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Another thing that helps is to literally say "STOP" to the thoughts when they come. And to say to myself "I am here and I am safe now". And to really ground myself in the present. I like to use aromatherapy or simmer water with oranges and cloves...smells seem to help me get present.
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This is really good.
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Another thing that helps me is simply not talking about it in therapy. I go, and we talk about other things, things in the present. The more I do that, the more grounded I get in NOW, and the more the trauma stuff fades into the background...at least temporarily.
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This is good,too. It makes me want to go twice/week. But I cant pay for that now. I know if I wanted to now work on traumatic memories, ftt would say OK. But I feel pulled to contiune, I am waiting for my session on wed.
[quote]And finally - it really helps me to have things to keep busy with that are kind of mindless and fun. I played so much guitar hero when I started therapy that I could beat ALL of my son's tween/teen friends - for REAL
Cooking is good. I played a lot of board games with my kids. Read non-triggery books (have you read Ann Lamott? I
her).[quote]
Maybe I can work on trauma and work on finding a way to be an adult during the week. To stay an adult. I dont know how that would happen. It seems like it would take more energy that I have. Board games can be fun, I havent read Ann Lamott. Actually, Im reading Irvin Yalomn....and the way he talks about his mother and his female patients triggers the s**t out of me. I guess not good reading at this moment for me....
I used to meditate. I thought about looking for a good yoga or meditation class in my area. There are many different kinds and Im not sure which to choose. It could get me out of the house 1 evening/week.
Thank, Tree
Brightheart- its true, my H can trigger me in a big way. Even if he doesnt mean some things the way I take them. Or just selfish behavior will trigger me.
I left a message for her this evening. I think she works a little later tonight and will probably call after she is done. I think.
Pachy- It might be a good idea to start a thread. Anything with the word sabatoge in it would probably generate a lot of responses.