i have recently demoted myself at work after my last hospitalization. i hadn't been doing a good job for about 6-9 months, and when i came out of the hosp i felt like i just couldn't do it anymore. i was ready to quit, when the secretary suggested she & i switch jobs. boss wasn't entirely happy, but it was better than having me quit impulsively.

now i am in the less-pressure, less-responsibility job at no pay loss (hurrah). unfortunately, my boss is aware of what i CAN do. what she doesn't realize is what i CAN do (& what i was doing) is accomplished with a great deal of effort, stress, & pressure, that i simply can't handle anymore. she has begun adding more & more things to the "secretary's" job, because she knows i can do it. it's getting more pressured, more responsibility, and less attractive.

i can't just walk away (although i'd like to). i live in an extremely rural area where jobs were always hard to find; now with the current economic climate they're impossible to find. my best bet would be walmart or something, & my back & my feet couldn't take that.

the whole situation is making me feel trapped, and for me, trapped makes me feel suicidal.

any thoughts, suggestions, or hugs?