“I get mad at him b/c I feel like he's just saying things to be nice”
wow – I bet that rings a bell with a lot of people here!

Really low self esteem and low self worth are SO prevalent with eating & weight problems (no need to get too hung up over ED or not ED) it can be that we just can’t believe anything good about us.

And it does sound like you are stuck in the horrible: feel bad = diet = disappointment = overeat = weight gain = feel bad = diet = disappointment …and so on and so on…cycle. Yuk!
But…now you are here and you can get support from the other members. And learn from others experiences.
And as Whoswho said…if you can get rid of the scales, that would be great. You are channeling everything into your concerns about your weight at the moment. If you could harness all that energy that you are currently wasting by worrying about your weight and use it for something else instead, who knows what you might achieve!

Start to look for your ‘small victories’ – you’re talking to your boyfriend about things and that’s great – you’ve come to a forum where you realise you are far from being alone in how you feel, and that’s a start. Time to take some more small steps forward!

Best Wishes,

Matt c