IDK how or what to feel about this...

Today I asked what exactly we were supposed to talk about in the last two sessions. T told me we are pretty much to going to talk about the progress I feel i've made, if i am feeling any anxiety about the move/transition and what else I feel like i need to work on....

I started out by giving her the url for my photoblog....I rediscovered my love for photography back in April---I have T to thank for that--- and haven't shared any of my photos with her. So i picked out my faves and created a quick photoblog so she could see them---cheaper than sending them out to be printed.....kinda regret it now...what if she thinks they suck or that there's nothing great about them, or that she's seen better or what if she doesnt look at them at all? Anyways, i wrote the url on a piece of paper and she tucked it away in her purse that was sitting next to her....she didnt put it in my file so she may very well look at it. Then she asked where I wanted to start. I told her IDK....

I let her take the lead, she asked me questions about all of the above. I made T laugh several times, which felt good and at the end she said wants me to still think about the progress i've made and what i feel i need to work on if/when i find a new T and we will discuss it next week.

( i have two consultations scheduled for the 6th and 7th of Jan....)

....i wanna pack T in my bags and bring her with me and set up shop in my new city

these last two sessions are confusing and are causing me a bit of anxiety. I was super nervous--more than usual sitting in the waiting room. maybe it's slowly creeping up on me that i wont be seeing her every week in the blue room. I won't have my usual comfy corner on the couch and my two pillows and the lanyard string she lets me play with when I forget to bring my malleable artist's eraser with me(keeps my hands busy and helps me to focus in session)...

guess i will go work on my last assignment.....