I've been in a similar situation and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. Therapy might be a good idea (ok, it definitely would).

One thing that strikes me about your post is how much blame you place on yourself. You didn't make your husband cheat. He is an adult who can make his own choices. As my mom told me when I was little, "only you can get you in trouble".

I hope you stop blaming yourself. It is not your fault. PM me if you ever need to talk.