Chris~

I know EXACTLY how you are feeling. And God knows how badly I feel for you because I can so relate. I'm there, as well. And I don't expect anyone to provide me the comfort I am in such dire need of. That can only come from within....and through the allowance of time and understanding.....I guess.

I'm generally a positive person. I usually see the good in anything. I'm normally the one who lightens the mood, the one who finds the cheer in even the worst case scenerios. The person who knows how to listen to those who need to express the anger and sorrow, (and relate), without trying to push the positive onto them...(as if they are not entitled to feel what they are feeling).
I accept without passing judgements....I think I do, anyway.

I've reached a point where I'm exhausted...emotionally. Despite my nature of the "ever so cheerful", the trials n tribulations of all this trauma that I've been through these past couple years have finally caught up to me. I'm wearing myself out trying to fool myself that I CAN be strong....or that I AM succeeding...or that there IS hope.

I feel alone, even though I am not alone. I am definately lonely.
I have arms to hold me in my time of dispair...but they are not the arms I long for. The ONLY person I long for is so unaccessable that it hurts to even think about it. Yet, I can't help BUT to.

Sigh.
I'm sorry, Chris. This reply of mine is no where near encouraging.
I, too, can go on forever with the sorrowful blah's of mine....no point, tho.

Wish I could at least sit next to you...offer you a smile and a shoulder and even an ear, if you needs.
All I can offer is text.....and a pixel or two>>>

Hang on, Chris. It's bout all we can do.....huh?

Much loves~
Mary