I have known my T for a very long time. I just get very paranoid and never want to disappoint her.

After today I am going to take a break from the forums. I feel like I need to distance myself before I start to post things that are only bringing other people down or making them stir up feelings that begin to make them feel like me.
My time line is still in tact...less then 2 weeks for me to make my decision.
I thank everyone who has been my friend, support, guide and hugger here at this time.
I do hope to come back soon but do not know if I will.
I'm sorry my post here isn't more encouraging.
I have been contacting old friends IRL that I haven't spoken to for awhile to prepare for whatever may come.
Now I need to withdrawl from here.
May each of you find your reason to make it one more day...and may you pray that I find it soon.