That yoga class sounds great for you, Blue. I think sometimes when we are relating with our Hs, we get some of their stuff as well, which certainly complicates things further. The challenges of relationships... The comments he makes might have more to do with him than you. Ftt has a great idea about agreeing that he should come along with you to yoga. Do you think he would?

Your childhood sounds like a lot of walking on eggshells all of the time. I've had that feeling during the times my H was drinking (he's sober now) and it is very stressful. It doesn't allow you to be free and relaxed, the way a person...and most especially a child... needs to be. I'm sorry that things were like that for you. I can't imagine what it must have been like to be afraid to come out of your room.

Why do you think the 8 year old detached from her sad feelings about her family? If you're journaling as the 8 year old then I imagine whatever she was feeling as a child and however she might express those feelings will be helpful for you and Ftt to discuss together.

From your dream it seems that you see ftt as someone who will fight for you and help you. Interesting. I almost never remember my dreams.