Quote:
Originally Posted by salukigirl
I completely agree with the statement that depression is "inherited". Its pretty obvious to others whether we respect ourselves or how we feel about ourselves. Just in body language, tone and choice of words, we portray how we feel about ourselves. So I think that if you watch a parent give off that aura your whole life combined with the fact that it really is a chemical imbalance, yes I believe it's inherited.
As with other traits from parents - it seems like we either follow the same path or do the opposite. A young boy watching his father verbally abuse his mother might think that's okay or might hate it and never talk that way to a woman. Mine has gone the opposite. I watched my parents fight and scream so I avoid confrontation if possible. I would rather go in the bathroom and cry alone than get into a fight with someone I care about. Which is good because I don't fight a lot, but also bad because I realize that it has made me a doormat to others. The best is to find a happy medium - whether that exists or not, I'm not sure.
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I agree, Sal. It's an either/or direction that the child goes.
LOL....Even though my parents had 10 kids, neither of them EVER expressed affection toward eachother. There were no "I love you's", absolutely NO touching eachother...not even hugs. No physical signs of love for eachother whatsoever. It made us kids wonder, "how the hell did they find time to make more of us kids?"...lol.
They projected to us kids that mutual affection was simply non-existent. Needless to say, during my upbringing any questions I had regarding anything pertaining to affection was found outside of the home. It forced me to seek and find for myself, (with many disastrous results, I might add).
Once out of house (in my mid-teens), and discovering what I had on my own, I decided that my life wasn't going to be hidden like my parent's was.
Once I began my own family, I saw to it that my kids received as much affection and support they could ever need. My loss was their gain...especially for my daughter. There was NO way that I want her to have to find out what it's about on her own.
Eventually, once into my adulthood, I was the one who "broke the ice" among my siblings to express the fact that it is perfectly okay to say "I love you". Sure, it was awkward at first. Some of my siblings took a while to be responsive to that, but with time, it spread among us. Now....whether or not THEY believe in what the words REALLY mean is anyone's guess. All I know is that it's how I feel. Them following suit is their choice.
I know what it means to me and that's all that matters.
Shangrala
