Hi All,
Well, I was recently diagnosed with BPII and I am having a hard time dealing with this illness. I am so frustrated with the ups and downs. I still am not sure that the diagnosis is correct, but it all seems to make sense. I experienced a terrible hypomanic episode over the summer during which I did horrible things that were totally out of character, including sexual escapades (and I am married). I was very hypersexual and consumed with drinking, partying and sex. I could care less who I was hurting and felt no guilt at all, I actually felt happier than I had ever been in my entire life. I felt invincible, beautiful & soooo happy. Anyway that all lasted about 2 to 3 months and then I crashed hard and experienced more guilt & depression than I ever have in my life, it was unbearable and caused me to seek the treatment of a therapist. When I crashed I experienced racing thoughts, sleepless nights, anxiety attacks, paranoia...it was terrible. I have been in a low level depression since with good and bad days. I have been reluctant to take any medication and I am just doing weekly therapy now. When I have a bad day I think about taking medication, but when I have a good day, I don't think that I need it. I am considering seeing a psychiatrist to talk about medication. If anyone has advice I would really appreciate it. Thanks!