Byzantine, Tatyana2009, FuzzyBear and NuckingFutz all the feedback and questions have been a God send. Being quiet never related to being snobbish but I can see where someone may think that. The bad influence question made me realize that I had taken the entire situation lightly when the husband were clearly mad. Still I can say the responsibility remained the married and non communicating couples. And whether I want female friend or to be a loner was good. I find the snippiness earliest in relationships with co-workers and place that in the area of competitivenss. Early in my life I realized that the only person I can compete with is myself. So you've all given me some good feedback. The question about wanting to push others away was it. Not in my wildest dream did I see this as an option as a cause. So as I sign off tonight I want you to know that the questions you've asked are connected. The bottom line points to fair treatment. I've got some decisions to make. I'll be back to let you know what's happening. Thanks!