I've not got much to add but my support, since the advice you've received already is so good. I want to reiterate this: your safety is number one. Emotional abuse is abuse too, and you don't deserve to suffer it. He tells you to get out, in order to make you feel bad, but then when he fears he's losing you, he'll suddenly shift and be sweet. That's a manipulative technique to keep you feeling lost, scared, and confused, as well as to keep you feeling bad about yourself. "Wow, look how nice he's being to me now, and here I've been so frustrated with him, aren't I a dweeb....?" No, you're not. As I said, that's a technique.

Please take care of yourself and get away from this toxic behavior. Refuse to let him treat you badly. You deserve better.

I know. I'm a domestic abuse survivor, who is now married to a wonderful man. He treats me with respect, and when I thank him for it, he tells me he's merely treating me how I shoud have been treated all along.

If there is one thing that Mike has taught me, it is that men do exist who will treat their partners well. Don't settle for less than that.