Hello, Lilly. Thank you for your post. My thought is that a psychiatrist may need to adjust or change you medications. Also, please tell your therapist what you have told us, even the part about whether therapy is worthwhile.

Lonely and depressed is a not a good situation. Please talk to your pastor. I expect he/she will welcome the opportunity to talk to you.

Disappearing does not make your problems disappear.

Please continue to post so we know how you are doing. Good luck.