Point taken CK23. Language is an interesting thing. So loaded with different meanings as in the case of the word 'negative'. I agree that a NO response or assessment of something is not always negative in the sense that it is wrong or needs to be changed or fixed. Saying No can be perfectly valid and as in your example be founded on personal preference etc and could in fact be a positive position to take with positive outcomes. We can't always agree or share the same tastes or see things the same way. You may love suchi while I might not but that doesn't make my negative opinion of sushi wrong or something I need to change to feel good about myself or to be respectful of my individuality.

My reference to negative in the context of this thread refers specifically to the unfounded and self distructive hateful messages that dominate my thinking when I am depressed. Those 'negative' thoughts impact how I feel about myself and the world and have a 'negative' impact on my life.

I think there is a difference if that makes any sense.

I appreciate your post because it kind of reminded me to give myself credit for being able to actually say NO or to validate my preferences. Sometimes my self loathing tries to convince me that I have no right to an opinion or a contrary point of view. That anything I might have to say is wrong when the truth is being able to say NO or express a non-conformist view is a very positive reflection of self love.