@ Byzantine... Exactly! It is paranoid to make someone feel as if you would jump off a cliff if they dont love you...I am 0% upset in my social dealings and daily life cos as odd as it seems despite my agony I am a master fake person and I have only gotten better at my routine life with time and experience... HOWEVER emotionally I am like a little child who is scared and insecure...Everyone needs a warm shoulder no matter if they have a 6 pack figure and a big round face deep inside there is a child who has a strong desire to be loved....She's always been there when I needed her friendship and I think I should at least get a few msgs from her now and then cos this all seems to be like one way traffic... Never a good sign! I guess there may be no traffic left after the msg I sent her... She'd think i've gone over the edge and cut me down... So long to another attempt at reaching out to others!