Hi ...I agree with Genevieve...this is not your fault.

You care alot and are frustrated and want her to be ok, which is understandable.

Another site which is very helpful is www.pale-reflections.com

Under the section "how can I help" it will point out to you that the person may be in extreme denial and what the eating disorder is "really" more about.

She may not want to admit to it or maybe she just isn't ready to and even then she's got to want to get help.

I think that this section might really be of help to you.

I had to use this section to help someone and myself.

I myself struggle in this area so I'm familiar with it.

Please take care and I hope you can understand this better. I also hope your ex can want to get help and get well.

Take care
Eva