I have had discussions about this in therapy. I (sometimes) tell anyone anything, or I do a lot of "Me too!!!" and then go on with MY story.
What T and I talk about is what I am looking for, or in fear of, in the particular situation that I am in, and the people in that situation (friend, co-worker, manager, stranger, etc). It isn't the behavior so much as what is pushing the button for the behavior to begin.
It can take time to slow down your thinking to catch these things, but there is much to learn about yourself.