Only been in treatment a year know, and have long way to go. A new one wrote in my journel last night. Dont know if i will give it to T. 'I' am afraid to.

Letter to T
I am afraid to trust you. I have learned that you are very accepting for the most part. I also realize you are human and have your own set of limitations. I continue to test you constantly to see just how much trust I can have. There has been so many times I have been betrayed, trust is extremely dificult. You say you have 'seen' parts of the whole, but you have your preferrences as to who you perferr in treatment. Do you not want to help all of us? Or just those that are more compliant? The only parts you will meet are those that feel you will accept them, that they can trust you not to reject. Even Bella is afraid of you. You talk as if thereis control over each other. Sometimes this may be true, but not always. There is much fear in this house, fear of rejection and disbelief. Fear that we are not real, we are. Running and hiding is a way of survival from pain, a way that may be continued if needed. We are one, but we are many. Please show acceptance and allow our trust to become greater in you.
Tina

Not sure why i am posting this, reassurance? dont know, SHelley