I had so many misconceptions about OCD i never really knew what it really was. But i read something about it the other day and decided to find out more. Anyways, now i'm 99% sure that i have it. I've looked n acted "normal" all my life, but that was only on the outside. Inside i've always known that something was seriously wrong w/ me. Never in my wildest dreams would my condition be an actual disorder that millions of people have. I thought i was the only one who had to do things in a strange way in order to fell ok, i really thought i was alone... Well it's good to know that i'm not the only one and it feels even better to know that i have an actual disorder that's "treatable". I'm going to find a psychiatrist n get a diagnosis and go from there, but since i just found out, i haven't gotten around to it yet. I'm still feeling a lil overwhelmed from finding out, b/c I know it's a life changing thing. No one has ever suspected me of having this disorder b/c my case of it isn't obvious. I haven't told anyone, so no one knows. Anyways, I don't know what I'm asking for through writing all this, but I would really really appreciate some input, any input. Please. By the way my obsessions are perfection, sometimes symmetry, doubting, checking, and being attacked by someone or "something". I also experience severe depression and I scored a 16 on the OCD test on this site (12 + means you most likely have it).