You know. I'm finding that the reason I don't have friends is because I try to treat others right. Just as you had mentioned and you know what, I think finally, that these people are seeking something from me to challenge them or give them meaning or even to make themselves feel superior. I've spent my life supporting others emotionally and financially and recognized that I AM A PERSON too! I really don't mind being alone but thought that it is strange that people have all these friends and I didn't. Attending parties, people always say that I'm surprising because I speak to everyone making small talk. Guess that's why I know a lot of people.

I'm in pain but the pain is subsiding. I'm watching while others are looking for a reaction and learning that there is something about me that is envied, someone likes or someone can't stand. There's always something about drama that keeps things going.

You mentioned about your husband. I think men get that way as they age. They're in the mother stage and seem to enjoy being a "kid" as though they are needing that motherly love. I enjoy my husband for what he's able to give right now.

I thank you for answering my response and hope dearly that I can provide some kind of help and care along the way. Thanks for letting me see that we possess a unique sensitivity that helps us to discern others. Wow, I just got the thought that maybe we are givers . . . givers in a sense that we haven' learned to fully take what we need.