MUE- That is exactly how I feel. Telling myself I am bad seems to be my way of coping and it is easier for me than realizing it was not my fault and I have been living out a "damaged" life. That is hard, sad and would make me feel so hurt if only I could feel something about it. I dont feel anything at this point.

I would rather judge myself as being crazy than damaged and hurt. It seems just way too painful to go to a place of sad and hurt and why did they act this way to me???