Sixblairs,
Yes, you are probably right that there are certain people who attract Narcissists. In your case, certainly, having a parent who fit that category, would make you more susceptible and accommodating to a partner with the same traits. In fact, I have talked to many people who followed your same pattern.
As for the Narcissist seeking therapy, and changing his/her ways, I would not hold out much hope, but I could be wrong. Becoming involved with a Narcissist initially, at the start, is an exhiliarating high...they can be so charming at first. They are skilled at "mimicing" love and affection, but they really don't feel it, and are incapable of feeling....except for themselves.
I have done more research and reading on the subject than I care to recount, since I too seem to attract such characters. In discussing this tendency to attract the N with others, it seem those of us with caring, generous and accommodating natures are easily swept into their (the N's) web, unless we educate ourselves.
Also, there seems to be a strong correlation between Narcissistic behavior and that of the sociopath, who also acts without conscience or empathy. (Some people just give them the blanket label as "con artists.")
I will be very interested to hear how your husband reacts to therapy. The N cannot bear to be challenged or forced to look at his behavior honestly in any way.
Seeker