thank you all for your responses...I can see how it is different in city & country living.. HOWEVER, I believe ( I might still be wrong ) smiles ......once you move into your own home and start a life with someone else then that should be YOUR domain. your not living at home anymore ..I just feel their needs to be boundaries ..my children would never get anything without asking first..they know they are more than welcome to have anything in my fridge but they always ask first. my children will knock on my door before entering ...I just feel sometimes like whats mine is everybodys and I dont have say in anything ..I think keeping the door locked is a good idea and might give them a hint ...thank you all so much!......lost