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Ya well HE says that there is stress in my marriage is because I don't satisfy him and he gets stressed and that is what causes issues. And yes...I spend money and don't have any regards for paying the bills and we have been evicted from four houses in 2 years because of it and I want it to stop. I am BEGGING for help. I know what is wrong with my marriage and it is that my husband gets stressed with my spending and shopping issues. If I could STOP that then he would be happy and I would be happy and yadda yadda. So she tells me that I am self medicating because of the depression which is no self esteem and that if I lose weight than I will quite self medicating and I will have friends and again, yadda yadda ....
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oooookay, you have been EVICTED FOUR TIMES IN TWO YEARS because of your spending??? you are BEGGING for help??? if you are begging for help and need to know how to fix things, you would be willing to take suggestions and try things. i'm sorry to just lay this out there but it sounds to me like you are not willing to admit what is really wrong and are not willing to take any blame.
in order to stop you need to do something else. you can't break a habit. you can only replace it with a better one. something non self destructive. i'm not saying that being with your man 22times a month is that solution, but have u even tried??
sorry, but if you know what is wrong you must know how to fix it right?? well apparently not. so instead of just thinking what they are saying is crap, why dont you give it a chance. devote yourself for one month to doing what both of them suggest and if after that one month nothing has changed then you should re-consult them. but that requires devoting to doing it whole heartedly and not undermining and *****ing about it the whole time.
also, starting by getting a good night's sleep IS one of the best and most important things. i'm speaking from experience. i just spend 4 out of the last 5 months like an insomniac. EVERYTHING is thrown off when your sleep is off. so yea.you should start with that. if you are really and truly committed to change and really and truly want it, you will do what ever is necessary. i started keeping a daily journal of my sleep, mood, and diet so that i could become more aware of howi was feeling and treating myself. which is exactly what abudget is and does. so why dont you try the same??
write everyday how much sleep you got, what your mood is like (i rate mine out of 10), what you eat, and what you spend. by doing that you are at least becoming aware of if any of those 4 things triggers one of the other 3.
i realize this message might be a bit much to swallow. please just consider it as tough love.
wishing you success!
