I feel like tearing the apt apart to find that damn knife AND YOU want to KNOW WHY?????!!!!

People like Wisewoman who say it would be great to have something like that (a anti-stigma; anti-SI "abuse" in ER's across the US & farther) BUT WHO WILL STAND UP AND TELL ME THEIR STORIES...................otherwise my life has absolutely no purpose what's so ever. This weekend I took an OD that SHOULD HAVE KILLED ME....I studied it beforehand...,I cut again & I really needed some time out to rest the body, kill the infections, respite..........BUT NO, they made me sit in the ER waiting room for 9 hours, denied me admission, so I took the OD...and the last thinng you want to hear is your husband saying "Are sleeping in today?"
I have a therapist on vacation who took my "S" threat as something comical; my shrink never talks to me (except every 3 months & if I say the "S" word to him, he says the State Psychiatric Hospital (I;ve been there/PTSD in motion) I have no friends (really! I'm totally agoraphobic...........so I cut! If I cut too deep I have to go to the ER & there.........I appreciate your support, ya'l but I can't handle this anymore........I can't even say the "S" word, and they'll probably delete this thread.......delete my life, everyone else has!
Peace to all who exit here: DAYZEE9