Hi Love... I found your thread. I am sorry you were left hanging. I don't have much to add that hasn't been said but I will try. My ex has diabetes and he really struggled when sex became more difficult for him. It bothered him more than me since I had long since lost my drive with the effects of menopause and depression. We had had a very active sex life before this and while I tried to accommodate him and he was very attentive to trying to make it enjoyable for me over time it became non existant. It was very hard on him because he really missed it. We have been apart now for a few years and I know it part the loose of our sex life made it easier for us to separate so I encourage you to work this through with your husband.

I would venture to guess that yes while it would be a good idea for both you and your husband for health reasons alone to take a hard look at your diet and incorporating more activity into your lifestyle, your weight has nothing to do with how attractive you are to your husband. You have always been a big woman. He married you as a big woman so why would your weight now be an issue? There is much more to it that is more likely related to his issues not yours alone. A frank discussion could help assure him that he is not in this alone. That together you can retain intimacy which is really what you want from sex more than the act itself.

I will tell you something about me that you may find interesting. I have a thyroid condition. Can never remember if it is over active or underactive but it doesn't matter. For a few years I was unknowingly being overmedicated and as a result I lost a lot of weight. My partner was vocal about not liking how skinny I had gotten. He missed my chub especially the boobs which had become nearly non existant. He said I didn't feel the same in his arms and while it wasn't a deal breaker for him or anything it took some adjustment and he was always trying to get me to eat to try to get some weight back on. He was gone before I got the meds corrected and did put some of the weight back on but I think about that sometimes. Maybe if I hadn't lost so much weight and maybe if I had been more attentive and if, if, if.....

My point is we can't let our insecurities play havoc with our thinking. If we have a concern involving our partner, talk it through and together you can make it work.